WEDDING NOTES™ – Engagement Photographs

As more and more couples choose to have engagement photographs taken, the opportunities to depart from formal studio posed photos grow.  Engagement photos can be used in newspaper announcements, on save-the-date-cards, or as part of the wedding day décor.  Working with a photographer on engagement shots also gives the couple a chance to see how they like the photographer and his/her work before they sign a massive contract for wedding photos.

If the couple is game, these photos can be more colorful, fun, and creative in the sites chosen.  Some of the themes chosen for engagement photos can be introductions to the wedding’s theme or just a fun expression of the places and things that mean a lot to the couple.  Discuss your ideas with your photograph.

• This is a chance to try some vintage shots.  Use a prop like an old car or antique bike or wear vintage clothes.

• Pose with suitcases, next to planes or trains or boats to show your mutual love of travel.

• Take advantage of sites in an urban setting.  Shot against a skyline or against an old brick or masonry wall can result in photos that will be different in look and feel from your wedding day pictures.

• For a change of pace, have the pictures taken at night.  Outdoor lights can be shot on timed exposures, or consider candles, holiday lights or night lights in active parts of town.

• Nature shots provide an opportunity for wide ranging activities.  If you have a love of the out of doors, have photos taken as you canoe, fish, water ski or skate.

• If you love carnivals, have your photos taken on a roller coaster or Ferris wheel or in bumper cars.

For more ideas about unusual engagement photos, stop in a chat with one of our experienced consultants.

WEDDING NOTES™ – What to Ask Your Planner

If you have decided to enlist the help of a professional wedding/event planner to assist with your wedding, you want to make sure that you are hiring the best.  Schedule an interview with him/her and ask important questions.  The answers to those questions will help you decide whether or not this person is right for you.  The certified wedding planners, who are members of Weddings Beautiful Worldwide, are likely to be the standard against which you evaluate the planners you interview.  They suggest that you review this list of questions and ask those that are important to you before you make your final selection.  

• Have you worked with any of the vendors or venues that I have in mind?  If yes, what do you know about them?  If no, are there similar vendors that you would recommend?  Why?

 

• How many weddings my size have you done?  Can you tell me about one or two of them?

• Who are your favorite caterers, florists, bands, etc?  Why do you like them? 

• Please show me a portfolio of previous weddings you have done.

• What is your role?  What is mine?  Who has what responsibility?  Who has the final say?

• How often do you expect to meet with me before the wedding?

• How many hours do you work the day of the wedding? 

• How many weddings can you handle in a month?  Do you have the staff to handle them all?
  If staff members will be involved in my wedding, can I meet them first?

• How do you charge?  Is it a flat fee or are there add ons?

• What kind of experience do you have?  How long have you been planning weddings?

Tell me how you handle emergencies or dicey situations?

WEDDING NOTES™ – Wedding Flowers

Choosing the flowers for your wedding can be a big decision.  Picking the style, color and budget allocations can be daunting.  But if you spend some time thinking about what you want, the selections of these important wedding accessories can give you the WOW factor you want for your wedding.

Selecting a florist is an important first step.  Ask for suggestions from friends, your wedding planner, or other bridal professionals.  Visit florists whose work you like.   Ask to see photos from actual weddings they have done.

 Think about how you will fund the flowers you want.  As you establish your wedding budget, think about the role you expect  flowers to play.  Wedding planners generally suggest a three part budget allocation.  Flowers for the reception are an important consideration since this where guests will see flowers first hand.  Many planners suggest the largest allocation here.

Secondly are flowers for the wedding party and immediate family.  Remember that bridal party bouquets are the most heavily photographed so don’t cut too many corners there.  Having bridesmaids carry a single rose for example, can be economical, but remember that single buds tend to look strange in photographs with stems sticking out in several directions.  Bridesmaids tend to carry them awkwardly.

Third and finally, consider ceremony flowers.  The church or venue will likely give you guidelines as to what is allowed.  If yours is one of several ceremonies taking place at a church in busy months, it makes sense to combine forces and dollars with other brides and choose ceremony flowers that will stay in place for all weddings.  If the space is huge, consider filling it with rental greenery.  If yours is a Christmas wedding, the chances are excellent that the decorations already in place for church services will be all you need.

For other ideas on how to make the most of your floral budget, stop in a see one of our experienced consultants.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Musts for the Bride to Be

As plans ramp up and your focus is THE WEDDING at the expense of other aspects of your life, take the advice of many wedding planners and Practice Self Care. Do whatever you need to do to unwind, relax and sleep well.  Take your vitamins, get healthy exercise and find emotional outlets for the stress you are under.  Remember your groom.  Do fun things together and plan together.  This is not the time to get run down and “catch” the bug that is making the rounds.  You need to be healthy and strong and resilient.

Get and stay organized. Start early and document every decision made around your special day.  It doesn’t matter if you have high tech records or sheets of paper clipped together or in file folders or paper bags.  Whatever system works for you- implement it early and keep it current.  

Set a budget and stick to it.  Early on the couple should sit down together and decide how much they can afford to spend on the wedding and where they feel it should be spent.  Agree on priorities.  Talk honestly with parents about their willingness and ability to contribute to the wedding.  Look at the major expense items – reception costs, honeymoon, clothing, photographs, entertainment, and flowers. Working within those guidelines makes other decisions easier.

Remember to be grateful for all that you have and all that others are doing for you.  You will get gifts, good wishes and offers of assistance.  Remember to thank everyone for their offers.  Weddings are joyous affairs and people want to be a part of a positive and exciting event that a marriage truly is.

Remember your plans and don’t be derailed.  You’ve set your budget and made significant decisions.  Don’t be tempted to play “one ups manship”.   You’ll go to other weddings while planning yours and see lots of ideas.  Some you’ll want to copy and others you won’t but before you do, remember your budget.  This is your wedding – not a copy of your old college roommate’s big day.  She had her event.  You’ll have yours.

Let go of bridal guilt.  No one can make everyone happy all the time.  Worrying about it takes up far more time and energy than is deserved.  Sometimes guilt is good.  It can help us deal with the feelings of others.  But most of the time, we are afraid we’ve let someone down.  Do your best to be aware of the feelings of others and honor them when you can.  But on the wedding day, you are there to please yourself and your groom as you begin your new life together.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Favorite Themes and Trends

Wedding planners contributed the top themes they are seeing for the year.  While it is fun to get ideas from these themes, what matters most is that the bride and groom have a wedding which is true to their vision.  The theme that the couple selects should have some personal relevance and meaning to them as a couple.  Why bother with a theme?  It provides a sense of continuity to all decisions made about the wedding – from the gowns to the flowers to the reception venue and the foods chosen.

Decisions are so much easier once the theme for the wedding is established.  Whether it is a color or a location or a time period or event,  the focus is there to insure that this  life changing celebration is memorable for participants and guests alike.

• History lovers may wish to be married in the “Roaring Twenties” of F. Scott Fitzgerald.  Art Deco can be the design focus.  Jazz was king and flappers wore short gowns and bling was everywhere.  As one planner noted, “most of the candy popular today, hit the markets in the 1920’s.   What a perfect reason to set up a sweets table for Milk Duds, Baby Ruth bars and Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.

• World travelers – or dreamers – will find a wonderful theme in exotic locations.  Tropical isles, far Eastern spots or Scottish highlands all provide a structure for food, décor, dress and paper products.

• Bright colors against neutral backgrounds can be very effective.  Instead of carrying out a color theme in the bridesmaid dresses, have the maids in a basic shade like platinum and carry out the color theme in the flowers and reception décor.

• The ceremony and/or reception location can provide the theme for a wedding.  If a museum is chosen as the venue, art and sculpture become the theme.  If a garden or beach or ranch is chosen as the site, the theme becomes clear.

• Medieval accents combined with fairy tale touches work well in historic buildings or modern redos which retain the original stone walls and structures.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Avoid These

Experienced wedding planners offer advice to brides because they love what they do.  They have lots of great ideas for creating a fabulous wedding, but they have also learned a number of things they advise their brides to avoid.

• Remember that you have invited guests to a party to celebrate this important day in your life.  Don’t punish them for accepting your invitation to the ceremony and reception by having a big time gap between the two events.  If you want to be married in your childhood church in the country but want a city reception, reconsider the time lag and distance between destinations from the guest’s point of view.  It can be hard to plan a seamless schedule especially if you have your heart set on locations miles apart or have ceremony and reception times that don’t line up, but if that’s what you end up with, consider providing transportation for all guests between locations or find a spot between the two where guests can “hang out” and be comfortable while they wait.

• You may want a destination wedding in an exotic spot, but before you book it consider whether or not your family, wedding party and guests can afford to get there or are able to get there.  You may think that declaring your vows on the edge of an active volcano is highly symbolic of your relationship with the groom, but the likelihood of grandparents making the trek is minimal. As one planner says,” Destination weddings can be terrific, but as with any wedding, it is not only about you, it is also about our guests.”  Where possible select locations that are easy for everyone to reach.  A well traveled spot for example is a good choice.  Plan the wedding well in advance so that potential guests can make arrangements to attend.  Provide travel information and group rates where possible.

• Try to stay in charge of the guest list.  Once the wedding budget is established, you’ll have a good sense of how many guests can comfortably be invited.  If your budget is a six-figure event, relax and let parents invite whomever they feel they must.  But if your budget is more real than imaginary, the list will probably need trimming.  Start early and ask both sets of parents for their preferred guest list in order of preference.  That way you can cut from the bottom if necessary.  Try negotiating the outcomes.  It is a great skill to learn.

• Don’t forget your fiance’.  Yes you are planning a gorgeous wedding – but remember that you are getting married to that guy.  Involve him in the planning process.  There must be an area of special interest to him that he’d like to organize.  Honeymoon plans, transportation, music – ask him what he’d like to do.  You do have a life outside of this wedding, so talk about it, make plans for your future together and remember why you said yes in the first place.  It is not all about crab cakes and ranunculus.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Wedding Don’ts

Yes the wedding will be exciting.  Of course it is the biggest party you’ll ever plan.  Yes the “rules” have relaxed and you want your wedding to be uniquely yours.  You can have it and be happy doing it if you managed to sidestep some of the no-nos that wedding planners advise their brides to avoid.

• Superbride is only in comic books.  You are only one person and accept that you absolutely can’t/shouldn’t try to do it all yourself and still be sane on your wedding day.  Obviously you will make most of the major decisions, but don’t get caught up in all the minute details that demand your attention every waking hour.  Don’t brush away offers to help.  People really do want to help so accept their offers.  Make a sound decision and hire a wedding planner to take care of that legion of details.

• Don’t have a cash bar.  You have invited people to this party.  Don’t ask them to shell out cash for some of their refreshments.  You wouldn’t ask them to pay for their dinners or for a piece of cake.  There are plenty of ways to watch bar expenditures.  If you want a bar, you don’t need to have only top shelf brands.  You can create a signature cocktail and offer only beer and/or wine to guests who prefer something else.  You can have an open bar for an hour only as the guests arrive and then serve wine at dinner.  Provide a table of non alcoholic drinks and punch.  Ask a friend or relative to help guests with their beverage of choice. Ask your wedding planner to help with other money saving ideas.

• Do not include gift registry information on your invitations.  Registering for gifts is a good idea.  It helps guests to make selections they know you will like.  However, giving wedding gifts is never mandatory even if the overwhelming majority of guests will give a gift.  The best way to get out registry news is by word of mouth (your mom and bridesmaids) or on your wedding Internet site.

Be a friend to your bridesmaids and not their boss.  Their official function is to witness the solemn event at which you take your marriage vows.  They are there to stand up for you.  Try not to take the “maid” portion of their title literally.  Yes they are willing to help but watch the demands you make on their time and pocketbooks.  Let them know how much you appreciate their willingness to be a part of your big day.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Paper Notes

Experienced wedding planners have shared some thoughts on assembling the guest list and selecting invitations that reflect the theme and focus of your wedding day. 

•  They remind brides that a formal wedding should be reflected in a traditional formal invitation.  Ten to twelve lines of copy using traditional format and wording is still considered correct.  This copy is formally correct, uses full names for all persons listed and follows the formal layout.  An invitation expert can help with any unusual wording situations.

• When guest lists are being assembled, be aware of the number of single guests on the list who have significant others (known in the invitation field as “plus ones”).  It is not considered mandatory to invite the significant other of a close friend, however if there are only a few invited guests to whom this applies, you may wish to consider including those individuals.  If there are a number of single guests being invited, you’ll need to see what doubling that number will do to your budget.

• Consider creating a wedding website and posting it   4- 6 months prior to the wedding.  This is done for the convenience of your guests.  It does not take the place of the invitations but does provide a way to distribute directions, a list of restaurants, hotels and places of interest for out of town guests, and other wedding related information for all guests.  It is also a place to list gift registries and receive some guest RSVPs to the ceremony and/or reception.

• RSVP cards are still in use by most brides.  Assuming you have the time (invitations went out at least 6 weeks prior to the event) it is a good idea to ask for RSVP cards to be returned to you 3 weeks before the event.  This gives you a closer count for the caterer plus gives you time to seek out stragglers and include them in the final count.  You probably can manage it with only a two-week window prior to the event, but three is better.

WEDDING NOTES™ - What Not to Expect from a Wedding Planner

We have heard lots of brides say with great relief, “I have a wedding planner.  He/she is handling everything for me.”  In fact, wedding planners can handle just about every aspect of your wedding, but there are areas that experts say belong exclusively to the bride and groom.  Your planner can make recommendations in some areas, but the final choices are up to the couple.

• You need to assign seats.  As one planner said, “It takes longer to explain the family dynamics to me than it does to just make the seat assignments herself. I can get the seating cards printed and make sure place cards are in the correct places, but the plan has to come from the bride and her mother.”

• You need to set your wedding budget.  The wedding planners can give you ideas and suggestions about how to allocate the total but they can’t determine the amount you have to spend. 

• You need to select the members of your bridal party.  No one else can do this for you – nor should they.

• You need to write your own vows if that is what you and the groom have decided to do.  You can use the standard vows offered by your church or officiant, but if you want to have your own, write them yourself.  And then edit your drafts as often as you need to until you are saying what is in your heart.

• Select your own music for the ceremony.  Wedding Planners have lists of music that others have chosen, but it is your wedding and you should have music that is meaningful to you.  This choice assumes that you have spoken with the officiant and understand the church’s view of music to be played.

• No one else can write your thank you notes.  Your guests came to your wedding and gave you a gift.  The least you can do is show your appreciation by thanking them.  You and the groom may decide to split the notes and each write half, but the couple must do it.

Wedding planners and coordinators can be a big help in not only assisting you with your wedding plan, but also doing the work necessary to execute your plan.

WEDDING NOTES™ - Developing THE PLAN

No matter how long your engagement may be, there are several key decisions that you must make early on in the planning process.

The list is in a suggested order but you and your family will need to decide which gets done first and why.

• Work out your budget.  Determine how much you have to spend and the source(s) for the funds.

• Decide on the type of wedding you want.

• Book your dates and venues for the ceremony and reception.  If they are to be in separate places try to minimize the travel time between them.

• Determine the officiant for the ceremony and book him/her.

• Research, decide on and book photographers, entertainment and caterer if needed.

• Find your dream dress.

• Think about the size of your wedding party and select members.

• If you will have out of town guests, book a block of rooms.  We suggest selecting two or three sites with varying price options from which guests can choose.

• Register for gifts.  Sign up at a minimum of 3 retail locations – again try for a range of price points.

• Consider hiring a wedding planner or coordinator to save you time and money.

There are many more decisions to make but taking care of these first will give you a structure to follow for other details.

WEDDING NOTES™ - Put First Things First

You may have been planning your wedding on paper or in your head for years before you ever got engaged. Or you may have had a whirlwind courtship and an even shorter engagement period.  Either way you can plan and pull off a great wedding if you take the time to PLAN.  

According to REAL SIMPLE magazine “The average American couple is engaged for 15 months”.  But your engagement may be a lot shorter than that.  Either way, you can manage it if you realize that planning takes place in two big time blocks:  the selecting and booking at the beginning and the coordinating of details at the end.  Those with longer engagements book the best vendors early thus ensuring their first choice of dates, times and places.  Those with shorter engagements find themselves booking and coordinating in compressed time frames.  

If yours is a shorter period of time, experts recommend that you focus your efforts on “the four components that guests are likely to notice – dress, food, décor and entertainment.  You may pick another four but categorizing elements of the event make it easier to handle and to make sure that what is important to you and your fiancé takes center stage.

Take time to figure out how elaborate a wedding you want and/or can afford.  Watching celebrities marry can give a bride an unrealistic look at the elements of a wedding.  This is your wedding – not a famous star’s.  Trying to do too much with limited resources can be a disaster.  Be realistic about the time you have to plan and the dollars available to support those plans.  

You and your fiancé should look at what is important to both of you.  Make a list and rank those items from most important to nice but not necessary.  Then start cutting from the bottom of the list until you are left with those items that are critical to you both.  Now that’s a plan you can manage.

WEDDING NOTES™ - The Bride’s Father

It may not seem like it to him, but the bride does worry about her dad and how he is feeling as the entire family gets involved in wedding planning.  He may feel left out or uncomfortable or just plain bewildered by all of the “hoopla” going on about him.  Our consultants often counsel brides who ask about the father’s role.

While many may see him as the walking, breathing checkbook for this event, his role is really more key.  His most important job is to be supportive of the bride’s decisions in most areas.  Certainly family discussions will take place, but once a decision is made, Dad’s support is invaluable.  He may think he is losing his little girl, but she still needs his support.

His official duties as father of the bride include riding to the ceremony with the bride (where appropriate).  He escorts the bride down the aisle on his right arm, and then joins his wife in the front pew (unless other arrangements take precedence).

As the official host of the reception, he mingles with the guests.  He may or may not stand in the receiving line.  That is really his call.  Some dads like it and others do not.

He generally keeps an eye on the bar and champagne supply and makes a short toast at the reception.

Traditionally, he has a short dance with the bride after she dances first with the groom.

Finally, he is the last person to leave the reception and says goodbye to the guests.

He may still pay the majority of the wedding costs and sign the bill for the reception, but in today’s weddings, many costs are shared.

His presence provides a sense of continuity to the event and his love and support for his daughter is a comfort to all.

WEDDING NOTES™ - Tips from a Planner

We know that it takes a happy combination of events and planning to produce a “perfect” wedding.  Here are a few tips from the professional planners at Weddings Beautiful Worldwide.

• If you are concerned about a guest list that has gotten out of hand and is too long for your taste or budget, assemble an unedited list of names (potential guests) and ask everyone involved to rank the names from most to least important. Count up the “most important” names and see what the list looks like.  If it is close to budget, thank everyone and settle the list.  If the numbers are still off, then ask people to cut a designated percentage from their lists.  Take stock of the new total and see  if the process needs to be repeated.

• Don’t even consider sending invitations to an “A” list of guests, only to invite someone from a “B” list when someone from the first list declines.  That is so “Kardashian”!

• To determine the size of the site you’ll need for your reception, be sure to investigate the parking facilities and the rest rooms as well as the size of the reception room(s).  The rule of thumb for toilets is that there should be at least one for every 25 guests.  The parking lot should accommodate one parking space for every two guests.

• Always have at least one attendant assigned to your gift table at the reception even if you are not planning to open and display the gifts there.  BY THE WAY, that is the best and preferred way.  Money gifts should be kept in special receptacles and secured.  Many weddings hire special security for the reception to keep an eye on gifts and to assist in their proper transport after the celebration is over.

• If parents and stepparents are contributing money for your reception, it is much better to pool the money in advance.  Then no contributor will demand to take control of how the money is spent.  If someone feels strongly about “sponsoring” a particular wedding expense, it is far better to know that up front and working with that person to accommodate preferences.

For more helpful advice, call or email us as we have answers to the most perplexing situations.

WEDDING NOTES™ - The Bride’s Mother

The mother of the bride has a very special place in the wedding planning process.  This special role is there whether or not she chooses to accept it.  For some, it is truly a “Mission Impossible”.  For others it is the role of a lifetime.  But what is important is that she is included.  

With families frequently separated by miles, jobs, schools or military service, the parental roles have changed but what has not changed is the importance of including mom in the planning process wherever possible.  Occasionally we meet mothers who feel left out of the plans.

What can you do?  It’s great to involve the groom in the plans but don’t forget mom.   She can make wonderful suggestions – so ask her opinion and advice.  Chances are excellent that she has had more experience in dealing with things like receptions, parties, caterers and florists than has the bride.

Most bridal fashion stores would counsel a bride to bring only one person with her to select her gown.  That person could/should be mom.  Today’s tendency to bring the entire wedding party and solicit each of their opinions on THE GOWN generally is not a productive event.  Who knows you and your tastes and dreams better than MOM?

She is also a good person to have along when you choose wedding accessories and gifts for your attendants.  After all, she has known you for a long time.

She is the perfect person to take charge of the master guest list.  She can eliminate duplicates, help make decisions on the final list and gather the addresses.

Seek advice on, or let her plan the seating arrangements for the reception.  She’ll be the one who knows who should sit with whom and who shouldn’t be at the same table.

Among all your friends, she’ll be the best at helping you put things in perspective when you feel overwhelmed by it all.  That’s what mom’s do!

WEDDING NOTES™ – Spreading the Good News

We encourage our brides to talk about their weddings with our consultants so that we can truly help brides with their paper trousseau needs.  Whether the bride chooses modern and streamlined or classic, there is a wide array of graphics and paper types to accommodate all tastes.  It is important to remember that the invitations you choose set the tone for the wedding celebration to follow so take the time to select/create the look you want.  It represents your guests’ first look at the excitement to come.

• If a bride is inviting many out-of-town guests or if the wedding is being celebrated over a holiday weekend, we think that save- the- date cards are important.  Ideally, they are sent out as early as 5 months prior to the event.  However, we always caution our brides to be absolutely sure of basic plans and dates and probable guest list before sending out the cards.  If the guest list ultimately grows beyond initial plans, it will be awkward to “uninvited” guests to whom you have sent save- the- date cards.  We advise sending them only to those family members and friends without whom you can’t see yourself being married.  They are “must attend/invite” guests.

• Remember that invitations offer guests a sneak preview of the tone and formality of the wedding, much thought should be given to the selection.  Formal wording should be used for a formal church wedding.  More informal prose can be used for more casual weddings or for ceremonies and reception set in unique venues.  Individuality can be expressed by choosing unique sizes, textures, colors, overlays and ribbons.

• While announcements are nice to send to those friends who live far away, invitations are a bit more personal and give the recipient a chance to attend or not.  To facilitate this, a reply card with a self-stamped, preaddressed envelope should be enclosed.

• Optional enclosures can be added.  Some may be dinner preference cards, or if it is a weekend affair, guest s may be given the option to choose activities they would like to attend.

• Plan to mail your invitations 10-12 weeks before the event – especially to guests who live far away.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Your Ceremony

He asked you to marry him and you said yes!  Congratulations!  If you know that you will be married in a church ceremony, as soon as you have shared the good news with close family members, it is time to think about when and where you will be married.

Once you have determined when, lock in the ceremony site and the reception venue.  Then other plans can fall into place.  As soon as possible, meet with the officiant and/or his/her representative to determine the “rules” guiding ceremonies in that church or synagogue.  With that information in hand, you can begin to formulate your own personal touches with the goal of creating a beautiful setting that helps to establish the mood for your ceremony to come.

As guests arrive, the setting – candles, lights, flowers and music can create a lovely atmosphere.
Instruct ushers to make friendly small talk with guests as they arrive and as they are escorted to their seats.  This is truly welcoming and helps guests to feel at ease.  If yours is a small wedding, ushers can present a single flower to female guests along with a note from you welcoming them to the wedding.  A welcome flower can also be presented along with the programs.

Consider having ceremony hosts welcome guests at the entrance doors.  Choose one from each family – someone who is likely to recognize the majority of the guests as they arrive.  Your parents may be mingling with guests at this point or may be needed with the wedding party.

If you have music playing as guests arrive and are seated, be sure someone is ready to cue the music to change tempo or volume or both so that special music plays as the parents of the bride and groom are seated.  More and more couples are choosing to have a card or note from them along with a single flower or small wrapped gift waiting in the pew for parents as they are seated.

Consider having the music change again as the groom and his best man take their places.  Then as the processional begins, the music should change again for the bridesmaids and flower girls.

The bride should make an entrance cued by more dramatic “announcement” music.  If the church or facility can manage it, consider dimming the house lights and turn on pre placed lighting aimed at the aisle just before the bride begins her walk to the altar.

Above all remember that the ceremony is the cornerstone of the day and the reason the guests have gathered.  The reception celebrates what has happened in that church.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Centerpiece Choices

Seen at current weddings – a wide variety of centerpiece options which complement the theme of the wedding and/or reflect the couple’s search for “something unique”!

For fans of traditional floral arrangements, there is the assurance that given the right color combo and size, guests will feel right at home with the idea of flowers on the table that complete the look of elegant special occasions.  Flowers work beautifully as long as the arrangements are either low enough (under 12-14 inches) or high enough (at least 30 inches) so that guests can converse across the table – or at least see each other.  Formal arrangements in glass or silver containers send one message, while daisies or sunflowers in canning jars send another.

With the changing view of wedding cakes, many brides are opting to make desert the centerpiece of guest tables.  Cupcake trees, lollipop cakes, cookie and dessert bar assortments and miniature versions of the bridal cake make perfect centerpiece options.

Guest favors artfully arranged on clear plastic or glass trays work well when accompanied by thank you notes from the bride and groom.

Candles of varying height and shape arranged on mirrors make a wonderful centerpiece for each table and their accumulated impact is wonderful.  However, be sure to check the reception hall’s heating/cooling system.  If a lot of air is going to be blowing over the tables, your candles won’t last long.  If your reception is in a tented area, think about LED tapers that look almost real.

Some brides have made the wine being served with dinner an integral part of the centerpiece.  With some greenery and/or wrapped cheese miniatures the different bottles make an intriguing focal point.

Collect a variety of glass serving pieces and fill them with beverages (or water) the theme color of the wedding.

Photos of the bride and groom as children framed and grouped in the center of the table, work well as centerpieces and conversation starters.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Bridezillas Are Wrong

We all realize that the bride and groom are the focal points of this very special day.  The wedding and its celebration are milestones in individual lives and family memories.  It is a significant social and personal event that deserves the attention given it.

But what many of us have learned is that the weddings that are most remembered are those which consider the family and friends who will be joining the couple in celebrating the event.
Here are some ways brides and grooms can focus on guests and family.

• Remember to treat attendants like the friends they are – not servants.  They are expending time and treasure to celebrate with you.  Certainly they are there to support your wishes, but not to grant your every whim.  Consideration and gratitude are welcome gifts to wedding party participants.
• When you are developing your gift registries, remember to include items for all price ranges.  Friends and family members want to give you as nice a gift as they can.  Spend some time making thoughtful choices.
• Select reception food that most guests will enjoy.  If you are planning an ethnic specialty, be sure to include an alternative.  Not every guest will welcome unfamiliar food.
• If music is to be played during cocktails and/or dinner, make sure it is background music soft enough so that people can hear themselves and others talk.
• If you are having a wedding dance, make sure that the band plays some “golden oldies” so that parents and/or grandparents and their friends can dance too.
• Don’t micro manage everything.  Once plans are in place let vendors you’ve hired do what you hired them to do.
• For everyone’s sake, try to limit the time delay between the end of the ceremony and the start of the reception to one hour or less.  If it must be longer, arrange something for the guests to do while they are awaiting your arrival.  No one wants to go home and come back again.

Remember that this is one of the biggest parties you and your family will ever give.  Make it memorable for your guests.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Alternate Sites

When a bride asks about ideas for a non-traditional wedding site, before we offer suggestions, we ask how flexible she is.  Planning a wedding at an outdoor site requires arranging two sites.  One is the prime location and the other is the alternate.  The weather has been known to ruin many original plans.  Don’t let that discourage you from having the wedding you want, but do have backup plans in place.

An outdoor site can be a perfect spot for those of different religious faiths.  It is a perfect choice for couples who love the outdoors or have families with extensive gardens or grounds.   Often outdoor sites are less expensive than closed venues.

The intimate setting of a chapel, beach, park or backyard offers the freedom to add personal touches to the ceremony.  The location choice will set the theme for your wedding celebration and once selected make many subsequent choices easier.  Canopies, tents and gazebos may be rented and needed.

Once you have secured plan A and plan b, other plans and decisions will flow more easily. Decorations, food, refreshments, entertainment and guest list will all be governed by the location decisions you have made. It is good to have another viewpoint and advice on the unusual celebration you have in mind.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Under it All!

All brides look for a wedding gown that has the look and features that they want.  Whether simple or ornate, there truly is a gown “out there” for every bride.  The guidance of an experienced consultant who knows each designer’s specialty can put her in the perfect dress.  The hands of a skilled alterations expert can make the gown of choice fit beautifully.   But even those professionals can’t change body shapes.  We all sometimes need help with that.

Some designers construct a wedding gown with built in corsets.  That can come as a surprise to a bride from a generation that thought corsets disappeared with the end of the Civil War, but the designer who added the proper “infrastructure” to the gown, knew what he/she was doing.

If your gown of choice does not have a built in minimizer or enhancer, rely on the skill and advice of a trained consultant who can help you find the proper undergarments to make the most of you and the gown.

The proper bra and slip and other “control” items like Spanx can help you feel and look your very best on this important day.

Be sure that the undergarments you choose are neutral or skin toned.  You don’t need a surprise color peeping out or showing through.  Be sure that you try all of the undergarments on under your gown and have a friend take photographs from the front, back and side so you know all is secure.
Far from being uncomfortable, many of today’s undergarments are designed for both comfort and camouflage.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Rehearsal or not?

Unless you are planning to elope or get married by a judge in his/her chambers, you and your wedding party are going to participate in a wedding rehearsal.  Even if you have been a bridesmaid in six weddings of friends, this is your wedding and you will want a run through.
What are the things you will want to cover:

• The order of the processional and recessional: who goes with who and who stands where and for how long.
• Where the photographer and videographer will be located as well as any musicians who may be part of the ceremony.
• What music will be played – when and for how long.
• Who will cue the wedding party to enter and exit.
• The offiiciant’s instructions and cues for vows, reading, music and movement.
• The duties of the flower girl, ring bearer, best man and maid of honor.

Who will run the rehearsal?

• It usually handled by the wedding planner you have been working with and/or the wedding coordinator from the church or synagogue where you will be married.
• The officiant will have input and the final word.
• You may want to ask a family member or friend to oversee the rehearsal to make sure all the questions are covered, but be careful not to choose someone who could be at home on a battlefield.  These are not orders to be given, but friendly and caring requests.

You are about to star in the biggest “show” you’ve ever been in.  No show goes to Broadway without weeks of rehearsal.   You are only asking for your bridal party’s attention for one hour or so and then they will be fed and thanked at your rehearsal dinner.  Make both parts of the evening festive.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Bridesmaid Gifts?

If you are asking if you NEED to buy them gifts, the answer is no.  But before you heave a sigh of relief, think about what those 3 or 4 or 5 friends are doing for you.  They are buying a dress, shoes and maybe a headpiece of some sort.  They are giving up a weekend for you.  They are attending one or more showers on your behalf and are no doubt giving you a wedding gift besides.  The gift you choose for bridesmaids is to be accompanied by a huge thank you for being a part of the most important event of your life.

What to give?  Jewelry, accessories, personal items, monogrammed items or items in their personal favorite colors are good choices.  These gifts are given either during a bridesmaid’s luncheon or given at the rehearsal dinner along with the groom’s gifts to his attendants.

More and more brides are electing to host a spa day for all of the attendants.  A day of personal attention and luxury is sometimes marred by the conflict of schedules kept by very busy women but most agree it is worth the rearranging required to make it happen.

If you have attendants coming from out of town it would be a nice gift to contribute to the transportation if you are able and/or provide accommodations for her/their stay.

In addition, we are hearing of more and more brides sending thank you floral arrangements to the bridesmaid’s place of work once she has returned.  We love getting flowers delivered at work, but this of course, depends on where she works and if such a delivery is appropriate.  In that case, send the flowers or plant to her home with a special card attached.

For some wonderful ideas about what to give and when to give it, call us and talk with one of our experienced consultants.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Photo Tips

After all the planning and purchasing and partying, what remains are the treasured photographs of your wedding day.  For many brides, the album and collections of photos are the most important record of the biggest day of their lives.    We have worked with hundreds of brides and enjoy seeing their photos when they return from their honeymoon.  We continue to add to the tips we share with brides on how to insure that they love the results of the photographic record of their wedding day.

• If the ceremony and reception are going to be big, make sure the photographer you hire works with an assistant at least.  Many consultants will say that as a rule, one should plan on one photographer per 100 guests, but a skilled professional with an efficient assistant should be able to handle your ceremony and formal photos without a problem. 
• Reception photos require a few formal shots and some informal/occasion specific photographs.
• If you have special photos you want taken, be sure to make a list of those shots and review them with the photograph prior to the ceremony.  If out of town family members are attending and you want large family shots, let the photographer know that as well.
• Consider having many of your formal and unique shots taken before the ceremony.  Your makeup is fresh, the gown unwrinkled, your hair fabulous and you have the glow of anticipation.

Besides, it will cut down on the time spent on photographs before your reception.

• Spend time before the wedding showing the photographer some photos you’ve had taken in the past that you like.  He/She will get a sense of your good side and how best to position you.
• When you are posing for formal shots, don’t just stand there full face on to the camera.  Take a tip from pros and remember to put your weight on your back leg.  It doesn’t matter which one – left or right.  Then place the other leg slightly in front and face the camera.  This will provide a more pleasing angle from which to be photographed.
• Ask your personal attendant to stay close and have pressed powder and lip-gloss handy for shots.  Keep the shine on your face down and on your lips up.

For other tips and advice on how to look your best for those lasting memories, chat with one of our professional consultants.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Gifts to Remember

Selecting locations for the gift registries for one’s wedding is important and fun.  For your guest’s sake, it is wise to select at least three different resources.  Your purpose is to give guests a variety of options and price ranges when it comes time to select your gift.  To that end, experts recommend that you choose at a minimum, one “high-end” store, one moderate/lower priced retailer and perhaps one “non traditional” resource like a charity.  www.Idofoundation.org is a good place to start as it can help you register for donations to a variety of charities.
As you peruse items for your gift choices, most consultants would remind you to expand your vision of gifts to include items beyond the “usual”.  Many couples end up realizing that they have the best equipped kitchen in town, but have no bedroom furnishings.  Seek input and advice from friends and family before you sit down together to develop your list of preferences.  Their ideas may help you to include items that would be helpful that you would never have considered.
REAL SIMPLE magazine asked brides to identify items for the “Things I Wished I’d Registered For” list they were compiling.  Here are some of the items that made the list.

• Extra Wine Glasses
• Oven to table bake ware – one or two casseroles that can go to parties and events and look good.
• Fine China – too many couples are selecting only something practical to use now.  Brides miss having some fine china to use for special occasions and to “pass on”.
• Bar B Q Grill
• Art pieces for home décor (consider including an art gallery in your list of registry locations)
• A cordless drill
• Decorative pillows and throws for the living room – a quick and effective way to add dash
• Christmas decorations – something special and classic that the couple could bring out each year
• Outdoor gear and equipment like Coleman stoves, backyard hammocks or lawn chairs.

For more help with your gift registry, talk with one of our experienced consultants, as we feature gifts that will be remembered for a lifetime.