Monday, November 24, 2014

WEDDING NOTES™ - How Many Attendants Should I have?

Like many aspects of wedding planning, there were once rather rigid guidelines that ruled the how and the who of weddings.  Some experts used a formula that said there should be a bridesmaid and usher for every 45-50 guests.  Fortunately, that has long been abandoned.

Bridesmaid numbers depend on who is close to the bride and who she wants to stand up for her.  Likewise the groom is freer to select who and how many of his friends to include.  But when selecting attendants, remember an important guideline - how many can you afford to have?  Every attendant is entitled to bring a guest so realize that every one you have means two for the reception per plate charge.

Once you've decided on a number, the bride and the groom should prepare a priority list of attendants.

You'll need to consider each other's families in creating the selection list.  A bride may wish to include the top tier of her sorority sisters leaving no room for the groom's sisters or the groom may wish to have a group of fraternity brothers plus his own brothers.  Once a number of attendants is agreed upon, something has to give.

What happens if the bride has eight friends she can't live without in her wedding party, but the groom - an only child has only 4 close buds?  If your budget can handle the expense, there are always ways to handle an unbalanced wedding party.  For the processional, one groomsman can escort two bridesmaids - one on each arm.  Or if symmetry is important, forget about male/female and just go by the numbers.  You have 12 attendants total and there will be 6 on each side of the bride and groom - 2 guys and 4 girls on each side.  This works especially well in wedding photos.  The result is balanced with color and diversity on each side of the bridal couple. 

It is your wedding day and common sense and good manners should take precedence over the "rules".

Sunday, November 16, 2014

WEDDING NOTES™ - A New Twist on Business Cards

If you work the chances are excellent that you have access to the company’s business cards or have cards bearing your name and title.  We are starting to see business cards bearing the names of the bride and/or groom who are in the business of getting married.  As one consultant put it, "Depending on the budget, the bride may actually be a fairly big business."  Cards are easily self printed on one's computer or can be done economically at many print shops.

Here is an example of useful copy:
Bride:  Mary Jane Doe      Groom:  John Michael Smith
Wedding Date:  June 15, 2015
E-mail special promotion or individual offers to:  maryjohn@mysite.com
Fax to: 999-999-9999   or Mail to:  12345 MyStreet North, My City, Stateand Zip

Including your phone number - home or cell - is your call.   Some brides are already inundated by phone calls and don't want or need more. 

Including the statement about "special promotions" gives vendors a clue that you are interested and ready to shop.

You may want to include a photo of yourselves.  The question most brides ask is whether to use their wedding site or to create a new temporary site just for receiving bids, information and for maintaining the wedding budget.  That is your call.

Once printed, stock your purse or brief case with cards and hand them out freely to vendors throughout the wedding planning process.

WEDDING NOTES™ - Flowers for the Ladies

Brides can get so focused on her flowers and decorative arrangements for the church and reception venue that she can give little thought to the flowers for others in the wedding.  One rule of thumb that is helpful to the bride as she orders corsages for other family members.  That rule is "If the word 'mother' is in the description, the lady gets a corsage.  And that means both the bride's and the groom's sides.   That includes mothers, grandmothers, great grandmothers, god mothers, stepmothers, and foster mothers.  They are all honored guests at the wedding and each should receive a wedding day corsage or wristlet.

The flowers don't have to be elaborate but should be suitable.  They don't have to be identical.  You may wish to have something special for the mothers, a different flower and/or color for grandmothers etc.  Choose soft, neutral colors that tend to go with everything.  

It is far better to choose less expensive corsages for everyone than to choose expensive flowers for a few and leave others out completely.  The flowers you present to them should convey love and respect for the influential women in your lives.  Be sure to include the names of these women in your flower order.  Then include one or two extras just to insure that everyone who matters to you is covered.