WEDDING NOTES™ - Leave Your Guests with Pleasant Memories

A great deal of time, energy, money and planning went into creating the wedding of your dreams.

Everyone wished you well and thought your wedding was one of the nicest and loveliest events they had attended.   But one of the biggest reasons that guests were so pleased to be a part of the event, is how pleasant and charming you - the bride was throughout the entire process.

We want our brides to be happy with the wedding of their dreams and we also want them to be the source of warm thoughts and memories from relatives and guests who see her at her very best.  She is gracious and focused on others.  The most charming bride is the one whose focus is not on herself alone, but one who shares her happiness with family and friends.

Some advice:  Don't talk about the weddingnon-stop.  It's good that you are enthusiastic and excited about your upcoming wedding, but hard as it is to believe, not everyone in your orbit needs or wants to hear every little detail, every day for the months of preparation.  As one guest remarked, "Believe it or not, the world was turning on its axis every day without everyone knowing every detail every hour."  Your wedding is OUR focus as we help you plan, but not every person you meet shares that focus.

 
Some brides have a "me first" attitude throughout the planning process.  That can be hard to take.  People wish you well and want you to be happy, but it is unrealistic to expect everyone to drop everything and focus only on you and your wedding.  WE will focus on you and we will help you create a memorable event while you the bride treat your family and friends with genuine care and sharing.

WEDDING NOTES™ - Thoughts on Gift Giving

As the wedding season ramps up, it is time to dust off the guidelines on gift giving for weddings.

We are frequently asked about when is a gift a must and when it is a maybe?

Here are some simple "rules".

SHOWERS:  If one is invited to a bridal shower and plans to attend - yes, a gift is in order.  Usually, a shower gift is smaller and more personal than the gift given at the wedding.  If one does not plan to attend, a gift is not required nor expected.  However, depending on one's relationship to the bride -to-be, a small gift of remembrance may be sent to the bride in care of the hostess of the shower or via another guest who will be attending.

WEDDINGS:  If one is invited to the wedding and plans to attend, yes - a gift is expected.  But if one is invited but cannot attend, the giving of a gift is optional.  We say "optional" because the norms around this are changing and even vary by geographic region.  Traditionally, if one was invited to a wedding but could not attend, a gift was not necessarily expected.  If the guest was close to the couple, a gift was usually sent anyway.  However, today's expectations are changing and guests may decide to gift anyway.  If the bride or groom are close friends or relatives, a gift is sent.  If you are only casual friends, a gift may be sent.  Emily Post experts now state, "You traditionally respond to a wedding invitation with a gift whether or not you are able to attend...".  Some guests may give a group gift which is a good way for casual friends to participate.

For more questions about gift giving, see our experienced consultants for assistance.

WEDDING NOTES™ - Thanking your Bridesmaids

As you add "Buy gifts for attendants" to your to do list, consider all that they are giving you.

Do you have to buy gifts for them?  No!  Do you have to thank them for what they are doing for you?  Absolultely!  Whether it's one witness at a Justice of the Peace or 6 college friends who are flying in to be a part of your special day,  standing up for you at your wedding is quite a commitment.  They are likely buying a dress, shoes and maybe a headpiece of sorts.  It's likely that they are attending at least one shower for you and will no doubt be giving you a wedding gift.  Some of them may have incurred flight or other travel expenses just getting to your wedding.   The gift you choose for your bridesmaids is important and must be accompanied by a huge thank you for being a part of the most important event in your life.

What to give?  There are many classic and innovative ideas to consider.  Here are some we know about.

• *A favorite is jewelry, accessories,  or personal items monogrammed or in individual favorite colors .  These gifts are usually given either during a bridesmaid's luncheon or at the rehearsal dinner along with the groom's gifts to his attendants.

• *If schedules permit, many brides choose to host a spa day for their attendants.  A day of relaxing massages, facials and personal attention is hard to beat.

• *If you are planning a destination wedding, paying their travel expenses would be a marvelous gift.  If you can't swing the airfare, plan to cover at least their ground accommodations.

• * Plan to send post wedding flowers to the bridesmaids at their place of employment whenever/wherever possible.  Send a thank you note with the flowers.  If they cannot be delivered to the job site, send them to her home.