We have heard lots of brides say with great relief, “I have
a wedding planner. He/she is handling
everything for me.” In fact, wedding
planners can handle just about every aspect of your wedding, but there are
areas that experts say belong exclusively to the bride and groom. Your planner can make recommendations in some
areas, but the final choices are up to the couple.
- You need to assign seats. As one planner said, “It takes longer to explain the family dynamics to me than it does to just make the seat assignments herself. I can get the seating cards printed and make sure place cards are in the correct places, but the plan has to come from the bride and her mother.”
- You need to set your wedding budget. The wedding planners can give you ideas and suggestions about how to allocate the total but they can’t determine the amount you have to spend.
- You need to select the members of your bridal party. No one else can do this for you – nor should they.
- You need to write your own vows if that is what you and the groom have decided to do. You can use the standard vows offered by your church or officiant, but if you want to have your own, write them yourself. And then edit your drafts as often as you need to until you are saying what is in your heart.
- Select your own music for the ceremony. Wedding Planners have lists of music that others have chosen, but it is your wedding and you should have music that is meaningful to you. This choice assumes that you have spoken with the officiant and understand the church’s view of music to be played.
- No one else can write your thank you notes. Your guests came to your wedding and gave you a gift. The least you can do is show your appreciation by thanking them. You and the groom may decide to split the notes and each write half, but the couple must do it.
Wedding planners and coordinators can be a big help in not
only assisting you with your wedding plan, but also doing the work necessary to
execute your plan.
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