Yes, life is less formal these days. Yes, times have changed but when you receive
an invitation to an event there are some obligations if you are to remain on
the guest list. These reminders are from
Emily Post - THE social interaction specialist.
·
RSVP This
term is from the French. It means
"Repondez, s'ilvous plait", or please reply. It has been around for a long time and it is
telling you that your host really wants to know if you are coming to his/her
event. The expectation is that you will
reply promptly.
·
How to
reply - You respond in the manner indicated on the invitation. If there is no response card included, sent a
handwritten response to the host at the return address on the envelope.
If there is a response card fill it in and
return it in the envelope provided by the date indicated.
If it states RSVP and gives a phone
number, telephone and speak to a person - answering machines can be unreliable.
If it says respond electronically, you may do so. Some invitations state "Regrets Only".
Reply only if you cannot attend.
If you don't reply it is the same thing as attending. You'll be
expected. In the rare instance where no
reply is requested, it is still polite to
let someone know you'll be there. A phone call will work.
·
What if
you change your mind? If you change
a "yes" to a "no" be aware that it is only
acceptable in case of illness, a death in the family or an unavoidable professional
or business conflict. Call the host
immediately and express regret. Know that
being a "no show" is unacceptable.
If you change a "no" to a "yes" it's ok only
if it will not upset the host or hostess' arrangements. Always ask before you just show up.
·
What if
you want to bring someone? Don't
even ask! Assume the invitation was extended
to the people whose names are on the invitation and no one else. If the invitation includes the phrase Mr.
John Smith and Guest - assume you may bring a date. Don't assume you can bring your children to
the event. If they were invited the
invitation would have said so.
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