WEDDING NOTES™ - Some Worthy Changes

For years and years brides have been following the tradition of throwing their lovely wedding bouquet into the air to be grabbed and tousled by single female guests at her wedding reception.  Worse, she had her garter removed by her groom and tossed to single men at the reception or auctioned off.  (Note:  The wise bride wore the garter below her knee.)   These customs came from European cousins who had in their history the tradition of chasing the bride to grab a piece of her clothing for good luck.

While the sentiment was nice, the practice wasn't, so brides began throwing flowers from the bouquet to the crowd chasing them in the hope that would slow them down enough for her to escape with garments intact.  The modern version of throwing the bouquet and/or garter says that the person who catches the item will be the next to marry - although not necessarily to each other.

The good news is that tradition is changing.  Today's bride often chooses to present her bouquet to her grandparents or to the couple at the wedding who has been married the longest.  Some brides have the bouquet constructed with a removable centerpiece that is used on the bridal table at the reception.  Other brides have a smaller version of the bridal bouquet - a tossing bouquet if you will - for those areas that still practice this tradition.  Very few brides ask for pictures of the groom removing the garter for her photo album.  Many of those shots are not very flattering and best not considered. Besides, most brides want to keep their wedding garter and instead provide a special tossing garter for those areas where it is still expected.

One new version in some areas is to have the attendants sign the bottoms of the shoes worn by the bride and groom.  Whomever's name is left legible on the soles of the shoes after a night of dancing is likely to marry next.

The important part of considering traditional practices is your comfort level.  If it makes you uncomfortable or feel silly, don't do it.  Instead, consider starting new traditions or finding ways to make old traditions your own.  We can help with ideas to put your personal touch on "something old."

WEDDING NOTES™ - What Should I Wear?

You find yourself with three weddings in as many months.  Are there any guidelines for guests?  Yes!  Your job is to help the couple celebrate this event.  Guests are invited to provide public witness to the legal ceremony taking place.  Marriage is a public statement which indicates the new legal status of the couple.

There aren't a lot of "rules" about what it means to be a wedding guest, but there are some traditional expectations plus the question - What should I wear?

Obviously times change and for many our current culture may be more informal than in the past, but a wedding is an important event that one honors by dressing appropriately.  To find out what is expected, check the wedding web page for clues as to how formal the wedding will be.  If you have friends in the wedding party, ask them.  But generally, these guidelines should help you decide.

1.  Don't dress to stand out.  Remember that the bride and groom are the stars of this event.

2.  When in doubt, it is usually better to "overdress" from normal rather than underdress.

3.  Avoid low cut, skin tight, skimpy dresses.  Don't overdo bling and/or glitter.

4.  You can wear a black dress - but white is iffy.  The rule on white is that it should not compete in anyway with the bride's gown.

5.  Be wary if the wedding is to be "informal".  Ask around about what others are planning to wear.  Try to take clues from where the wedding is being held.  If it is in a cathedral with the reception following at an upscale hotel, you know to go for more formal attire.  If it is at a cattle ranch, you know that it's likely to be more informal.  Ask friends about what their take is on "informal".  It should mean you've made an effort to appear well put together rather than cut offs and flip flops.

6.  If the wedding is "semi formal" it means that men should wear a suit and tie and women should wear a suit, a tailored dress or pant suit.

7.  If the wedding is clearly a formal affair, men should wear tuxedos and women should wear cocktail dresses - long or short - but remember rule #3 above.

Whatever level of appropriate dress you decide on, one other item to include is to wear your very best manners.  It is an important day in the couple's life and one honors them by behaving well.

WEDDING NOTES™ - Old, New, Borrowed and Blue

We all know that singsong rhyme but not many know where it came from.  Most brides just buy a blue garter and hope that covers it.  But the traditions surrounding it are quite charming.

The something old is usually covered by the bride choosing a piece of jewelry or other accessory to represent the chain of happiness flowing from one generation to another.  When a bride uses her mother's wedding gown or other family heirloom she is recognizing that this item symbolizes the ties between generations of family.

The something new is the marriage itself.  It is symbolized by wearing something new that helps bring good fortune and success to this new union.

The something borrowed is usually on loan from a married friend to help bring happiness to the new bride.  The items can been pieces of wedding attire (like a veil) jewelry, or even a handkerchief or a family bible.

The something blue belongs to a tradition which dates back to biblical times when blue stood for purity and fidelity.

The English addition of the phrase  "and a sixpence in your shoe", is a favorite.  If a bride places a coin in the left shoe, it is said to ensure wealth and mean that a bride will always have money.

WEDDING NOTES™ - Going Green

If you are determined to mount a "green" wedding, we can help you integrate eco friendly products and ideas into your wedding plans.

1.  Plan to stay local.  Choose a venue that is closest to the majority of your guests.  This allows a maximum number of people to save gas and commuting time.  The ideal would be one location for ceremony and reception.  Saves time and gas consumption.

2. Check with a wedding planner in your area.  He/she will know about energy efficient locations what practice recycling, avoid Styrofoam containers and other green procedures.

3.  Search out local catering firms that specialize in serving organically grown,  in season foods and beverages.

4.  Work with a florist who uses only locally grown flowers and greenery that are free of pesticides.  Choose only in season flowers and plan to repurpose ceremony flowers for use at the reception site.

5.  Choose only eco friendly printed items.  We have resources that specialize in 100% recycled papers and non toxic inks for use in invitations, programs, napkins.

6.  We can direct you to designers who have utilized eco friendly fabrics in their designs.  If you are one of the lucky brides who will be wearing an heirloom gown, our alteration specialists can help with the fit and repair that may be necessary.

7.  In keeping with your green theme, choose only natural gifts like tree seedlings, organically grown bulbs and plants for guest favors.

8.  Even wedding rings can reflect your environmental awareness.  Before the engagement ring is purchased, check it's country of origin and try to make sure it is not a "blood" diamond or from a mine that practices environmentally harmful extraction techniques.