WEDDING NOTES™ - Memorable Wedding Photos

If most brides were asked what they would save after a disaster like a fire or flood or hurricane, chances are they would say photographs and many would specify wedding photographs.  For something that important it makes sense to take steps before the wedding to insure those photos and videos are special.

Choose your photographer (and videographer) carefully.  You will view the work of many.  You've gotten recommendations from friends.  You've sought references.  You will have discussed his/her style of photography and made sure he or she had the flexibility to shoot the wedding that way you wish to have it done.  To insure that what you want happens as you want it, take steps to increase the likelihood of a positive outcome by developing your own contract or by reading closely the terms of the one the photographer offers.

Some thoughts for inclusion:

• ·         Be sure to give your photographer a list of people and events you specifically want captured.  (Be careful not to script the shots so closely that the "must have" list you provide precludes his/her ability to take advantage of candid or "can't miss" shots.  At the same time, you should feel comfortable saying NO to shots that just aren't you.

• ·         Make sure that any written agreement includes a clear statement of the package details you have selected.

• ·         Be sure you are clear on the photographer's copy right policy.  Read it carefully.  Make sure that you are clear about posting any photos you wish to your website or that you can email photos to family and friends.

• ·         It wouldn't hurt to have the name and number of any backup photographer who would be available in an emergency.

• ·         You will want the date that proofs will be available and how long you may keep them.

• ·         You will want to know how long the photographer will keep negatives.

• ·         You will want reorder pricing.

• ·         You will want confirmation in writing of deposit amount required and total cost and payment due dates.

• ·         If yours will be a large wedding, check to make sure that your photographer has an assistant along to arrange group photos and assist with special lighting needs.

WEDDING NOTES™ - Dressing the Groom

While the bride usually purchases THE GOWN for HER DAY, most grooms choose to rent their wedding apparel from a well respected and well known men's formalwear specialist.  Most grooms will find their best selection and service at a retailer known to or affiliated with the store where the bride found her dream gown.  Having one consultant can give the couple the confidence to know that the wedding party will be well fitted and dressed for that special day.

Because most couples want all the men in the wedding party  (with the possible exception of the groom,) to wear matching tuxes with the same shirts, same ties, same vests, it makes sense to select a vendor who can provide all of the members of the party with the sizes, colors and styles and accessories chosen.

A formalwear specialist will have a wide variety of styles and formality available.  They will have samples of the latest looks available for try on and sizing.

A good formalwear shop or retailer will have trained staff on hand to take and record measurements to ensure an excellent fit.  They will encourage the groom and best man to work closely with the male attendants to insure that they get in to be properly sized in a timely manner. 

 They will urge members of the wedding party to pick up their tuxes well in advance of the wedding to insure that there will be time to complete any last minute size adjustments.  

The formalwear specialist you select should have experience in sizing and selecting tuxedos for wedding parties whose groomsmen are athletes or fitness buffs or are otherwise big and/or tall men.  Not all styles worn by the "average" man will work well on bigger groomsmen.  The best formalwear retailer will advise on which styles will flatter all members of the wedding party.

WEDDING NOTES™ - Friends and Attendants

Selecting your attendants for your wedding can be an easy choice for some but for others, an agony of indecision.  If you are planning a small intimate wedding with only the sister of the bride and the brother of the groom in attendance, it couldn't be simpler.

If however, your dream is to have all of your close personal friends with you at the altar, there are some issues you may face.  Cost is one!  If the bride wants all of her sorority sisters in the wedding but the groom doesn't even know that many people he would ask, there's a potential problem.  Some choices need to be made.  

It is very likely you will have to make concessions when finalizing your wedding party.  Keep these ideas in mind as you complete your choices.

• ·         Before you start naming names, the bride and groom must agree on quantity.  Each of them should have a potential list of candidates for attendants.  Let's say your list contains 8 names.  If you agree on five attendants each then you each take the top three on each list and slot them in.  Next you alternate choices.  It doesn't mean one person gets all his or her top choices, but they each get some.

• ·         Ignore the old formula that said the number of bridesmaids a bride should have was one for every 45-50 guests.  Have as many as you can afford without looking like opposing softball teams at the altar.

• ·         If you are searching for a way to let someone know how much you'd like her to be a bridesmaid but can't - make her an honorary attendant.  Ask her to be your personal attendant.  Ask her to handle the guest book and be an official hostess.  Make sure she has a corsage.

• ·         If you have two best friends and don't want to decide between them, ask them both to share maid/matron of honor duties.  If your older sister is married and your younger sister is not - you have a matron of honor and a maid of honor.    The married attendant stands next to the bride during the ceremony and manages her train and veil at the altar and holds her flowers.  The maid of honor holds the groom's ring and any specialized readings, prayers or special ceremonial items.  Both of them would give reception speeches.  Both would receive special attendant gifts.  They can be dressed identically or choose gowns with minor adjustments.