WEDDING NOTES™ - Bouquet Alternatives

Perhaps you have decided that a bouquet of fresh flowers is not your choice to carry in the processional. Not to worry - there are many other options that may work for you.

If you or your groom have flower triggered allergies, consider silk/artificial floral arrangements.  They can be just as lovely as real flowers and won't leave you red eyed and sniffling.  If your talents don't run to assembling bouquets yourself, you can order them through many craft stores.  Or you can abandon flowers all together and consider carrying a bouquet of feathers which are gorgeous and unusual, or carry strands of crystals, or origami birds.

If you have a special passion for poetry, use that as a theme for your "bouquet" of rolled parchments bearing lines from some of your favorite poems written in ink that matches your color scheme.  You might also carry that poetry theme into decorations for the reception.

Or, you could bypass bouquets altogether and carry a fan, a special bible, a small parasol, a rosary or a small clutch handbag.  If you are planning on a unity candle in the ceremony, carry a lit candle down the aisle instead of a bouquet and light the unity candle early in the ceremony or place your candle on the altar.

Check your ethnic background for other wedding traditions that you may like to utilize.  For example, Irish customs call for the bride to carry a horseshoe for good luck (with the open end up so the luck doesn't run out).

You've seen or maybe received an edible bouquet. Consider a lollipop arrangement in the colors of your wedding.

There is a vendor that will make fabric roses out of vintage fabrics, scarves, even neckties from someone dear to you and arrange them in a lovely bouquet.

Of course, you could elect to carry nothing at all.   It is your choice.

WEDDING NOTES™ - Let Them Eat Cake or Pie or?

At one time choosing a wedding cake was easy.  You figured many quests were expected, you went to your neighborhood baker, you picked white or chocolate layer (s) and gave the baker the address for delivery and a deposit.  Done.

Today's couples are busily going to cake tastings, bringing swatches of material to determine the color of the frosting, debating between marzipan and cream frosting, debating about size and shape and then repeating the process for the groom's cake.  It doesn't have to be this way.

Here are some cake ordering tips that can save you money.

• ·         Unless you really want one, don't order a multi tiered cake.  Instead, order several round single layer cakes.  Place one of them on a tall cake stand and surround it with the other round layers on varying heights.  It provides visual interest for the desert table and costs far less.
• ·         If you wish to have a tiered wedding cake, order a smaller version and have sheet cakes available for serving to guests.  It will taste exactly the same but cost much less since the time invested in frosting/decorating the sheet cakes is far less.
• ·         Order one show cake that you can feature in the photo of the cake cutting, but have your baker or caterer, make enough smaller cakes to be the centerpieces at guest tables.
• ·         Order enough cake for 3/4th of your planned guest count.  Some people will leave before the cake is cut and others just don't want desert.
• ·         Let your cake cutters know that you want 2" slices cut rather than giant hunks of cake.  It is a substantial dessert portion and much more in line with people's view of dessert.
• ·         One bride we know chose to serve plates of cookies and biscotti to each table prior to cake cutting.  It gave her and her groom a chance to greet all of the guests and thank them for coming.  Cookies cost less than cake and many people prefer that to cake.  She ordered only a small "show" cake for the photo.
• ·         You don't NEED to have a cake table.  Many brides are opting for a dessert table with a variety of offerings.  You can have an ice cream station, pies, cupcakes, cheese cake or even a fountain of chocolate for dipping fruit or pretzels.

WEDDING NOTES™ - The Seating Chart

There are plenty of areas that require input from MOM when planning a wedding reception.  Who to seat where and with whom at the reception can be a difficult PR challenge.  But a diplomatic and tuned in mother of the bride can be a huge help.

When working with the caterer or venue manager, they will need to know not only how many guests will be in attendance, but they will need to know how the bride would like the room set up.  Will there be a head table for the bridal party?  Will it include the parents?  Will there be separate head tables for the bride's family and one for the groom's family?  Will you number the tables or name them?  Who will sit where?  Is it a big deal for some guests and not an issue for others?

The best advice?  Agree on room set up with the caterer and then reconstruct that layout on paper and practice placing guests on various configurations.  You may have agreed upon long rectangular tables but think that 8 or 10 person rounds will work better.  Work closely with the room manager to insure the maximum best use of the facility.

Find out from the groom's parents about any special seating needs or issues as you help your daughter prepare the seating charts.  And keep these basics in mind as the chart is worked.

1.  Don't seat divorced or divorcing couples together.

2.  Don't seat a divorced person with a table of happy couples.

3.  Don't seat guests who haven't spoken to one another for decades at the same table.

4.  Don't seat heavy drinkers right next to the bar.

5.  Don't seat elderly relatives in hard to reach seats.

6.  If you have guests who love to dance, seat them close to the dance floor.

7.   If you have relatives that don't get along, avoid placing them at the same table.

8.  Unless you have planned a special children only reception to coincide with the adult reception, always seat children with their parents and not at a kid's only table.

9.  Be alert to potential problems if you have numbered tables for honored guests.  Some people are highly sensitive to slights - like being assigned a seat at a lower numbered table.  Avoid this by naming tables like - Love, Peace, Joy, Heaven etc.

10.  Be flexible enough to do some last minute juggling of places if you see a problem developing.